100 Stories of the Marauders
by Marauders' Girls
Summary: By both Sirius' Girl and James' Girl! 100 oneshots involving our beloved Marauders. Yay for Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, and Prongs! See inside for more info. :D
1. The Rules

**Alright! Sirius' Girl here. This is how this will work:**

**-Each chapter is a one-shot, not a continuous story from chapter to chapter. **

**-You can request a one-shot by PM, e-mail, or review. Any plot, any pairing, whatever. Nothing is impossible. -winks- But let's try to keep it within the "T" rating, mmkay? n.n Thanks.**

**Reviewers get cookies. Constructive criticism gets a hug (or a brownie, your pick). Mindless flamers get an hour in James' Girl's Torture Chamber of Doom™. And then they're turned over to me. -evil look-**

**Any ideas? Present them please! If not, please be patient, we'll get started soon!**

**But to give a little taste of randomness, we now present you with a little skit/introduction thing by none other than our favorites... the Marauders!**

On cue, Sirius and James skid in wearing tuxedos and tophats.

"I've got you now, Prongs!" Sirius yells, brandishing a cane.

"I think not, Padfoot!" James shouts back, pointing his own at Sirius.

The two procede to sword--er, cane-fight.

Off to the side, Remus sighs. "They're going to hurt someone," he says.

"Like each other?" a new voice asks. Remus looks around behind him and finds none other than Lily Evans standing there, in a glittery green dress.

"Lily? Why are _you_ all dressed up?"

"Everyone else is," she shrugs.

"Oi, pay attention Prongs!"

WHACK!

"OW!"

James had heard Lily's voice too, and was not expecting Sirius to smack him over the head with his cane.

"You're drooling," Sirius told him dryly. James ignored him and walked over to Lily, practically trance-like.

"E-Evans..." he said. "Has anyone told you how marvellous you look in green...?"

"You just have, does that count?" she asked, looking flattered all the same.

A dreamy smile spread across the Marauder's face. Lily giggled.

Sirius rolled his eyes.

"The cane-fight was more fun."

**Well, there you are. That wasn't supposed to make sense, but I liked it. :D Anyway, we'll start writing real one-shots soon!**

**-Mrs Padfoot. :P**


	2. The Pig We all Know and Hate

**The Pig We All Know and Hate**

James' Girl

**JPJP**

As time went by his feelings for her only intensified. And by his sixth year of loving her it had driven him just a little mad.

"Aaaahh!" A shrill voice called out in alarm as ice cold water was dumped on her head. As she looked down she saw that her beautiful white sundress was completely see-through, yup, see-through. When she heard sniggers coming from the bush behind her she spun around, her face as red as her hair.

"Potter!" As she screamed his name in her blind fury, the laughter stopped and a very haughty looking James Potter stepped out from behind the bushes, grinning like Christmas had come early. He bowed and three other boys came out and followed his lead.

"What in the hell is this?! You prat!"

"Why Lily-bug, I have no idea what you are talking about," he said with his eyes roaming over her exposed body, but she didn't notice, she was far too busy glaring at the arrogant young man.

"You ruined my favorite dress!"

"I think it looks gorgeous on you, darling. What do you think Padfoot?"

"Mr. Padfoot would like to say that, Ms. Lily looks quite lovely. What about you Wormtail?"

"Mr. Wormtail agrees with Mr. Prongs and Mr. Padfoot wholeheartedly," here he gave a little bow. "And you Mr. Moony?"

"Mr. Moony would like to say that he had nothing to do with this, Ms. Lily. But even after all of that he would also like to add that Ms. Lily still looks very pretty," Moony grinned in spite of himself, he was a Marauder for a reason, after all.

"I rest my case, luv. And now that that mess has been cleared up, I would like to talk with you on other, more important matters. We go to Hogsmeade together, what say you to that, Kitten?"

"I say you are an arrogant, egotistical jerk! You and your big head can go but count me out, Potter!" She turned on her heel and began walking away, but before she could get very far she heard James call out to her.

"Your dress is see-through, luv! Just thought you outta know!" His comment was met with roaring, barking laughter. Lily screamed her frustration and pulled out her wand. No one heard exactly what spell she had yelled out but the next thing anyone knew James Potter was turned into a great fat pig, as pink as the day he was born.

All the Marauders coming together captured the squealing, oinking James. The boys, Wormtail almost in tears, decided to take him to Professor McGonagal. And as they we're heading to the castle they had Lily's laughter following them the whole time. But worst of all was they ran into Severus Snape on the way,

"So," Severus drawled, "Potter has finally been turned into the pig we all know and hate!" Sirius punched him square in the jaw and they continued their trek to the castle.

"Really it's what he deserves," said Lily as she got ready to take another corridor back to the Gryffindor common rooms. The pig in Remus' arms gave a loud squeal and twisted around trying to get to the ground.

"Lily," Remus said in a warning tone.

"Well it's true, you tell him the next time he does something like this to me again I will personally castrate him. Or permanently turn him into a pig. Whichever I can think to do first," she smiled sweetly and left the three boys and pig standing in the hall staring after her. The three boys with horror filled faces. And the pig pushing himself closer to Remus, making almost silent squeals.

When they reached the Professor's office they knocked and waited to be greeted by their Head of House. And when the door did open they were greeted by their Head of House, but the shocked look on her face and the gaping mouth she was sporting was something they hadn't expected.

"Hi Professor,"

"Oink! Oink!"

"Oh, my..."

**JPJP**

**A/N: This is me, James' Girl! I hoped you liked my first fic for this. It was really a spur of the moment kinda thing that I wrote in History class when I didn't feel like paying attention. Which would be most of the time... lol **

**-James' Girl**


	3. Corinne

_**For Sayuri-Chan-Chan**_

_100 Tales of the Marauders_

_**Year: 5th**_

_**Genre: Romance**_

_**Pairings: RemusxOC**_

_**by: Sirius' Girl**_

**Here it is, finally, Sayuri-Chan-Chan! -sweatdrop- So sorry it took this long. I hope you like it, though! It should never have taken this long, but it would take even longer to try and explain myself. -sigh- So please accept this and my most heartfelt apology. **

**I have to admit, I was pretty clueless at first, but then an idea hit me and... well, here it is! x) Ah... the love bug bit our little werewolf hard. Hee hee! **

_**Corinne**_

by

**Sirius' Girl**

_**or**_

**Mrs Padfoot**

_**-:- I solemnly swear I'm up to no good! -:-**_

She was always there. _Always._ The same amount of time as he. She always sat a short distance away, too. Right at the Ravenclaw table. How had he not noticed her before this year? _How?_ Ah, it was amazing to watch her. Wonderful. Her black hair caught the light as she tossed her head in laughter. One of her friends said something funny, and the whole group of girls had dissolved into giggles.

"Oi! Moony!"

Remus jumped and stared at a hand waving in front of his face, dangerously close to his nose. He looked and saw the hand was attached to Sirius Black.

"What's with the spacing out lately, mate?" James said, peering at him.

Remus turned pink. "N-nothing."

James and Sirius looked at each other and then back at Remus. "Come on, Moony, tell us!" James insisted.

"There's nothing to tell!" he insisted. Sirius grinned and his eyes traveled over to the Ravenclaw table, where Remus' "spaced out" eyes had been gazing. He nudged James and nodded in the direction.

"Got a cute girlfriend there, mate, how come we've never been introduced?" Sirius asked, causing Remus' cheeks to absolutely glow red.

"She's not my girlfriend, Sirius. Cut it out," Remus said through clenched teeth. Sirius chuckled.

"You've got your eye on her, though, don't you?" James prodded. "I see why, she's a knockout."

Sirius grinned like a fool. "And this is the one head over heels for Evans over there, so you know he's gotta be telling the truth," he said. Remus glared at his friend. Sirius and James could be a little overbearing at times.

"Speaking of such, you gentlemen will have to excuse me," James said, rising from the table and sliding into place right next to Lily, who looked very displeased.

"Get away from me, Potter," she growled.

"Aw, Evans, I haven't even gotten started," he complained.

"Exactly! I don't want you to _get_ started!"

"But we seek your almighty female advice!"

"We do?" Sirius asked.

"Yes, we do," James replied, looking straight at Remus. Remus' eyes widened.

"James Potter if you say one more word--" he began threateningly. James waved a hand his way dismissively and draped his arm around Lily's shoulders, much to the girl's annoyance.

"Now, Evans, this is our problem. See, our friend Remus here, he really likes this Ravenclaw girl--what's her name?" he asked Sirius.

"Corinne," Sirius replied instantly. Remus stared at him, his angry look at James broken for once. _Trust Sirius Black to know the name of every female student in Hogwarts,_ he thought dryly.

"Yes! Corinne. See, she's right over there. Now, poor Remus here... Well, you know him. He's shy. So... How do we get these two lovebirds together?"

Lily gazed from James' smiling face to Sirius, who was looking mightly amused, and Remus, who was glaring daggers at James. She looked at the Ravenclaw table. She _did_ know who they were talking about. Corinne was a nice girl. Pretty outgoing--she wasn't one to shy away from speaking her mind. She and Lily weren't exactly best friends, but they got along okay. Lily looked back at James, narrowing her eyes slightly as she removed his arm from her shoulders.

"First of all, I'd probably make sure Remus _wants_ your help," she told him dryly. She stood up. "Girls like respect just as much as guys do. They want a _nice_ guy," she said, giving James a cold look. James put an offended look on his face.

"What? I'm a nice guy!" he protested.

"Some would dispute that statement," she muttered as she left the table and headed out of the Great Hall--towards Gryffindor Tower, they believed.

**-:-:-:-**

"Hey, Corinne!"

Corinne turned her head, trying to locate the person who'd called her name. She found her, startled. "Lily?" she asked, walking over to the corner, where the Gryffindor girl was hiding behind a suit of armor.

"Uh, yeah. Look, I need to talk to you about something, okay?"

"Sure. What's it about?"

"Well, that's a long story. Come here," she beckoned the Ravenclaw. Corinne followed her, a bemused expression on her face.

**-:-:-:-**

"So they're definitely going to let us set off fireworks at midnight?" Peter asked eagerly.

"Yep," James replied. "McGonnagal told us herself."

"What convinced her?"

"Dumbledore," Sirius said, stretching in his seat by the fire.

"_Dumbledore?_" Peter squeaked.

"Yep. Remember that last time McGonnagal shot our idea down?"

"Well, you did keep asking about it in the middle of Transfiguration," Remus put in, not looking up from the book he was reading.

"And we complained about it in Potions. Apparently Slughorn thought it was a delightful idea and skipped off to talk to Dumbledore," Sirius continued.

"Dumbledore thought it was wonderful as well, so now we get to set off fireworks for the New Year!" James added as a cheer. Several of the girls in the room giggled. James grinned their way and Sirius winked at them. They burst into another fit of giggles and leaned close together to start up a furious, whispered conversation. Looking quite pleased with himself, Sirius put his arms behind his head, lounging luxuriously. Remus rolled his eyes and focused on his book once more. Or he tried to. He kept seeing Corinne's smiling face instead of the words on the page. He shut the book with a sigh.

Several heads turned when the portrait of the Fat Lady admitted another Gryffindor into the common room. James was among them.

"Evans?" he said. Lily froze. "I thought you left before everyone else?"

"Yeah," she replied. "And?"

"And why are you the last one here?"

"Who made _you_ king of the castle?" she retorted.

"Me," Sirius chirped happily. Lily glared at him.

"I'm tired," she said. "I'm going to bed." With that, she was gone for the girls' dormitories.

"Don't miss the fireworks show!" James shouted after her. He got no reply. James crossed his arms, a slight pout on his face. Sirius snickered at him.

"James, it might be better for your health to just leave Lily alone," Remus told his friend.

"Shut up, Moony."

**-:-:-:-**

New Year's Eve. Under the supervision of the professors, there had been several tables placed on the grassy lawn in front of the Great Hall. Little snack plates were laid out on them everywhere, and with the enormous amount of students milling about, none of them noted the little house elves moving quickly to refill empty platters.

The students were buzzing with excitement. Everyone was wondering what the fireworks show would include, and if the Marauders would pull one of their now legendary stunts or practical jokes. Eyes kept glancing up at the top of Gryffindor Tower, where some of the girls could swear they saw four dark figures moving.

A red haired Ravenclaw looked around. "Hey... Where's Corinne?"

**-:-:-:-**

"Perfect," James said, standing back and gazing at the first lineup of fireworks. He looked at Sirius and the two grinned at each other. Peter stood off to the side, holding a box of matches. Sirius cast him a glance.

"Why do you have those? We can use our wands, you know..." he pointed out. Peter blinked.

"Oh... Right," he said, his cheeks turning pink. James chuckled.

"Oi Moony, what's with the clamminess?" Sirius called over his shoulder at Remus. Remus said nothing. He was gazing at some distant point on the horizon. Sirius snickered. "Hey Prongs, I think Moony is daydreaming. Or he's plotting your demise for that stunt you pulled with the 'love advice from Evans'." James chuckled.

"You two are _so_ witty," Remus drawled.

"Alright... ten seconds until midnight!" Sirius shouted. Down below, there were cheers, claps, and whistles. He grinned. "Ten! Nine!"

The crowd began counting along. "Eight! Seven!"

"Um... Remus?"

Remus jumped and looked to the right, the source of the voice. His heart skipped a beat. "C-Corinne!" he said.

"Four!"

"Hey," she said, giggling.

"Uh... hi," he replied, swallowing. "Um... what are you doing up here?"

"Lily snuck me up here."

"She did? Why?"

"One!"

"_Blastoff!_" Whistles and bangs filled the air. The students cheered.

Remus Lupin found Corinne's lips pressed softly to his own. She drew back, gazing up at him with big brown eyes. "I've liked you for a long time," she confessed, her cheeks pink. "And--"

"And Lily set this up?" Remus asked, trying to comprehend what was going on. Fireworks were exploding. Everyone was shouting. Corinne kissed him. Corinne liked him?

"Yes," Corinne said with a smile. "I, er, didn't mean to put you off, but I just..."

"Oh that's perfectly alright..." Remus said vaguely. He still wasn't sure that he wasn't dreaming. "Do me a favor?"

"What?"

"Pinch me."

She looked at him. "...where?"

Remus nearly choked on his own tongue. "N-no... I meant... I'm not dreaming?"

"Not unless we're having the same dream," she giggled.

He grinned. Corinne laughed.

They suddenly heard catcalls from their left. Sirius and James were having the times of their lives. "Lookit the lovebirds!" Sirius declared. Corinne giggled. Remus frowned.

"Sirius..."

Corinne grasped his hand. "Your friends are hysterical," she laughed. James was making a fool of himself setting off the next round of fireworks. Remus rolled his eyes.

"If you say so. Bloody lunatics," he added softly. Corinne laughed again.

"Remus?" she said.

"Yes?"

"Happy New Year."

**Well, the fireworks were going to have to be for the new year. We just celebrated the fourth of July over here, so that's where the last fireworks I saw were. :P But our friends over the Atlantic don't celebrate this holiday. -grins- Of course, Sirius and James would love to set off fireworks for any event... but you know... It wouldn't be allowed unless it were for a special occasion. I have a feeling Dumbledore-sama likes fireworks. They're so pretty -laughs-**


	4. That 70s Contraption

_100 Tales of the Marauders _

_**Year: 7th**_

_**Genre: Humor**_

_**What to expect:**__**In short: Insanity. Pure insanity. Teaser? An endless laughing fit for Mr. Prongs. Lots and lots of name calling! Also--ROCK N ROLL! WOO! And whole bunches of "oomph"! (This will make sense - relatively speaking - soon. xD)**_

_**Rating: K+ or T. Take your pick. -shrugs-**_

_**by: Sirius' Girl, with a lot of help from her friends.**_

**So, first and foremost, I want to thank my friend Magnas for a- inspiring the idea for the fic, b- coming up with title ideas, because I am horrible at naming things, especially stories, and c- finding a picture for me so I actually know what the hell a 1977 radio looks like now. xD May I add helping pick out the songs and deciding how to end the fic? I told you I had a bunches of help. xD Also to James for voting on certain things and making this fic possible.**

**Also, a great big loves and hugs to my little sister - who? James' Girl, of course! -laughs- Just because she's special like that. And she's cute enough to be cuddled that much, so there. xD And she also helped with songs stuffs too so yeah. x3**

**Lyrics from a random lyrics site as always...**

**DEDICATION: Nii-san, this fic is for you. x)**

**Also, no one quote That 70s Show at me. Like I said, I didn't come up with the title. I've never seen it. xD (The show...)**

* * *

_**That 70s Contraption**_

by

**Sirius' Girl**

_**or**_

**Mrs Padfoot**

_**-:- I solemnly swear I'm up to no good! -:-**_

* * *

"Hey James, lookit that." 

"Hunnh?" James Potter grunted, looking out from under a copy of the _Daily Prophet_ that had been spread over his face. Sirius had prodded him out of what had been on its way to being a rather nice doze. "What'm I lookin' at?" he slurred sleepily.

"_That_ you nitwit, can't you see it?" Sirius said, pointing to a table halfway across the Gryffindor common room where a small black contraption sat.

"Yes, I see it. What about it?"

"What is it?"

"A radio, you idiot."

"What kind of radio is that?" Sirius asked, frowning at the device. James sighed. He just wasn't going to get any sleep.

"It's a Muggle radio," he replied.

"A Muggle radio? What's it doing here?"

"Muggle Studies most likely."

"Oh yeah..." Sirius left his seat on one of the big plush chairs and crossed the room to the Muggle radio, picking it up in his hands and turning it over. "What's with this knob right here? And these buttons?"

"I don't know, I've never used a Muggle radio before."

A grin crept onto Sirius' face. "Let's figure this thing out," he said, sitting next to his friend with the radio in his lap.

"And by 'figuring this thing out', you of course mean..."

"A radio-ectemy!"

"You're losing your edge, Padfoot. Couldn't you have called it something... I don't know. Something with more _oomph._"

"_Oomph? _You're saying I don't have any _oomph?_ What would _you_ call it then, oh mighty possessor of the _oomph?_" Sirius retorted, sarcasm drenching his statement.

"A radio-ectemy."

"I thought that didn't have any _oomph_," Sirius pouted at his friend.

"Sure it does. When _I _say it." James grinned. Sirius punched his arm.

"You dolt. C'mon, let's do this!"

**x-x-x Ten Minutes Later x-x-x**

"OUCH! JAMES GETTITOFF! IT'S TRYING TO EAT ME!" Sirius Black's voice screeched.

Lily thought her heart would leap from her chest. _What on earth...?_ she wondered, pushing the Fat Lady's portrait all the way open and stepping into the common room. A unique sight greeted her.

Sitting in the middle of the common room floor were James and Sirius. Between them was a Muggle radio--_her_ radio, she realized. Several buttons lay on the floor around them. The reason for Sirius' shouts of the radio trying to eat him was the panel on the front of the radio with the station numbers on it. He had apparently tried to pry it backwards and stick his hand inside of the thing, and it instead closed on his wrist. Sirius Black had single-handedly gotten his hand stuck inside a Muggle radio, and was still shouting at his partner in crime to help him. James wasn't going to be of any help to him, however. He had collapsed backwards on the couch with laughter and couldn't seem to reign control over himself. He caught sight of Lily, standing there staring at the whole scene, and dissolved into hysterics again.

"Lily!" he gasped. "Lily--Sirius--!"

"Yes, I see that," Lily said dryly.

"Lily," Sirius whined, "can't you get this thing--_ow_, don't kick me James!--get it off me!" he shouted, attempting a retaliatory kick at his fellow Marauder. He missed horribly, managing to overbalance himself and tip over backwards. This turn of events served only to send James into more spasms of giggles. Lily rolled her eyes. With a flick of her wand, she easily freed Sirius' hand from the radio. He winced, rubbing his sore wrist.

"Now would you mind telling me _what_ exactly you were doing with my radio?" she demanded, crossing her arms.

James and Sirius glanced at each other. "A radio-ectemy!" they chirped in unison. Lily stared at them.

"A--A what?" James opened his mouth to explain. Lily quickly cut him off. "Nevermind, nevermind... I think I get it. I need this for a project I'm doing, mind not doing any operations on it until I'm done with it?" she asked of them, repairing the dismantled radio as she spoke.

"Sure babe," James grinned.

Lily sighed, holding the radio in her hands. "I wonder what they're playing...?"

"Won't matter, it won't--"

"--work at Hogwarts, yeah, well, I've done my own experimenting with this one," Lily said with a smile. She pressed a button and static blared out at them.

"That is Muggle music?" Sirius said, confused.

"No, you fleabag, that's static," Lily retorted, starting to fiddle with the dials. James snickered at the 'fleabag' remark. Sirius gave them both an irritated look. Suddenly, a song blared over the loudspeakers. The trio listened to the lyrics - _"I want to reach out and touch the sky. I want to touch the sun but I don't need to die."_

"Say what?" Sirius asked.

"I like it," James grinned, staring avidly at the speakers.

"How do you understand the lyrics?"

_"I'm gonna climb up _

_On the mountains of the moon _

_And find a distant man _

_A-waving his spoon..."_

"I don't." Sirius stared at him as if he'd lost his mind. "What, you don't like it?"

"What do you mean, I don't like it? I love it. But what's he saying?"

"Something about the sun and moon I think."

_"I've crossed the ocean, turned everything _

_I found the crossing near a golden rainbow's end _

_I've been through magic and defied reality _

_I've lived a thousand years and it never bothered me."_

Lily giggled. "That's Black Sabbath," she informed them.

"Black Sabbath, huh?" Sirius grinned and shared a glance with James. "They've got it, huh?"

"Got what?" Lily asked, bemused.

_"Got no religion _

_Don't need no friends _

_Got all I want _

_And I don't need to pretend."_

"The _oomph_," James said, nodding sagely. Deciding she wouldn't even bother to ask, Lily began fiddling with the dials again. More static greeted their ears, along with snatches of commercial jingles. Sirius looked disappointed about the loss of the sounds of Black Sabbath. Lily whizzed through several stations. She caught part of a song and settled on it with an excited squeak.

"KISS!" she shouted.

"You don't have to ask..." James said, smirking at her. Lily rolled her eyes.

"KISS is a band, oh wise one," she said.

_"You show us everything you've got_

_You keep on dancing and the room gets hot._

_You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy!"_

"Hey, I like this one already," Sirius said with a sly smile.

_"You say you wanna go for a spin_

_The party's just begun, we'll let you in_

_You drive us wild, we'll drive you crazy!_

_You keep on shoutin', you keep on shoutin'..."_

Lily took a great breath and sang along with the chorus: _"I... wanna rock and roll all niiiight... and party every day!"_

"Well dear, why didn't you ever say something?" James asked, grinning like a fool and sweeping Lily into his lap. Lily shrieked with laughter and kicked a leg.

"Watch it!" Sirius shouted, barely avoiding a broken nose due to Lily's foot. "New song, new song!" he shouted, trying to distract the annoyingly happy couple.

"Okay, okay," Lily said, giggling, turning the knob on the radio once more. She found a station and stopped on it with another giggle as the song's lyrics started.

_"If I leave here tomorrow _

_Would you still remember me? _

_For I must be travelling on, now, _

_'Cause there's too many places I've got to see..."_

"FREEBIRD!" she shouted at the top of her lungs, exploding into a fit of giggles. It was her turn to get the look from James and Sirius that said obviously she has lost her mind.

"Um... what?" James said, staring at the redhead still laughing before him.

"N-nothing, nothing..." she said, green eyes glittering from glee and began changing the channels again. Sirius looked at James, who looked just as utterly lost as his friend. "It's a thing... at concerts... it's hard to explain..." she said, shrugging.

"Oookay..." Sirius said slowly, looking once more at his best friend. He had an odd twinkle in his eye. Sirius waited for the inevitable impish grin to follow--which it did. "Oi Prongs, what's with the mischief-making look?" Sirius said eagerly.

"They play concerts," he said simply. Sirius' face soon split into an equally impish grin.

"INVASION TACTICS!" Sirius shouted at the top of his voice. "MOONY! WORMTAIL! Get down here, we gotta mission!"

"You know, tickets are expensive..." Lily was trying to tell them. It was no use. She sighed. "I have a feeling I will regret this," she muttered under her breath.

* * *

**Bwahahaha... Yes I'm insane. Yes my friend are insane. Yes James and Sirius are insane. Yes we're all insane. Aren't you happy now?**

**What have I got to say after that? ...**

**ROCK AND ROLL! -headbangs-**


End file.
